You may ask…how do you type so well, Oscar?
Simple. Dew claws.
I’m a pug with the brain of a human and the fur of a…pug. Yes, I may lack a snout but I make up for it with character and butt wiggles.
I have a lot of thoughts about the world and the humans that contain me. For example, where are kibbles harvested from and why do they resemble rabbit poops? Why do I have to tinkle outside and Mom uses a funny chair inside? And why do people laugh at my eyes? You wish you had 180 degree vision like me. Imagine what your favorite quarterback could do with eyes like mine.
Yeah, sometimes I’m bitter but I’ve been a loner most of my life, so it comes naturally to me. I have plenty of stories though, man have I been on some ‘ventures. Let’s face it, I’m the kind of guy you want fur-ing up your couch because what is a house without pug snorts and cinnamon bun tails? You’ll want to follow me like my parents chasing me down the street on a summer night. I’ll follow you back if you send me treats.